Self Care and Goal Setting

Making Self Care Part of Our Goal Setting This Year!

Studies have shown that less than 25% of people stay committed to their resolutions after just 30 days, and only 8% accomplish them. Don’t be part of that statistic! Now that the year has started, set your goals, not resolutions.

Why Goals?

That’s simple because goals are specific, whereas resolutions tend to be broad and vague. Goals are much more actionable, which is what makes them more effective. 

How to Make Your Goals Solid? 

Get clear on what you want to accomplish, why it’s essential, and how you’ll make it happen. Take something broad like making more money this year and break it down. How are you going to make this money? Do you plan on starting a side business? What steps will it take to start the side business? If you’re looking to start this business, do you have the right networking materials or people and resources, have you updated your resume, and how do you plan to search for the resources to do this? Will you need to hire a mentor a coach or take classes to do this? What else will you have to do? Get as specific as possible and outline the smaller steps so that you reach your full potential goal, but don’t forget to include your self-care goals!

The more specific you are when breaking your goals down, the more likely you are to accomplish this goal. When your goals are broken down into manageable parts and pieces, you’ll be able to track your progress and stay focused. It’s easy to lose focus when your goal is too broad. This is why only 8% of the people that set New Year’s resolutions reach them by end of year.

The HOW!

  • Choose weekly actionable steps and check-in Daily on your progress
  •  Plan time each week to review your progress. Five minutes can go a long way
  • Make review time strategic on your calendar so that you are reminded to do this

You want to make working on your goals I have it and become a natural part of your daily routine! Consistency is the key to making goals SOLID! 

STARTING POINTS

 Do Inventory on Yourself.. Find out Who You are at this Point in Your Life

  • Look deep before you leap include looking at your NEXT steps in life as 

            well. While your relationship with others is important, your relationship   

            with SELF is MOST important!

  • Take a personality test. You will be surprised that while some things stay the same, life have a way of changing some parts of who we are. Meyers Briggs, StrengthFinders are to name a few.
  • Complete an interest survey                                                                       
  • Write down your goals, plans, and priorities. …
  • Perform daily self-reflection. …

Be Intentional About Being Kind to Yourself

  • Simply work on forgiving, accepting, and loving yourself although most of us have a hard time being intentional with this task.
  • Forgive yourself for not showing up for every event. We can’t be everywhere at once. Forgive yourself for not playing all the roles people in your personal and professional life requested of you. 
  • Forgive yourself because we aren’t perfect! 
  • Know that it’s ok to Just Be Human!

As Dr. Kristin Neff says, “imperfection is part of the shared human experience.” 

Learn to Treat Yourself as You’d Treat Your Best Friend

How do you treat friends? Take it a step further.  How do you treat your Best Friend? We share our goods, spend money on them, shower them with treats, plan vacations, and other things. There is nothing too grand for your best friend! When thinking about how you would treat others that you care about,  it should help you gain perspective about how you should treat yourself. 

Practice What We Preach

Ways to Practice Being Our Own Best Friend

  • Allow yourself to make mistakes.  We have to let ourselves off the hook just as we would when doing the same for others. If a friend doesn’t feel up to answering your phone call, you probably won’t assume they’re a terrible person. You may even worry enough to check on them to be sure all is well. In the same fashion that your friend may just need space and not be taking calls or conversations, you should make this time for yourself. It’s ok to suspend judgment for others and self.
  • Be Empathetic towards yourself. When your best friend feels hurt or upset, think about what you would do as their protector and best friend. Typically, you may give a friend their favorite edible treat, flowers, rub their back and assure them that all will be well. You find yourself citing positive affirmations. You do whatever it takes to cheer them up! Now practice these things for yourself. Order flowers for yourself, post positive affirmations on your bathroom mirror, buy your treat after a difficult day. Learn how to be a friend to yourself first!

                    Try this How to Treat Myself Like a Friend Exercise

Form Some Good Habits

  •  First, find a habit tracker that works for you. Use It! Several are available for FREE.  See this one from TeachSmartWithMe.com
  • Write your habits down. According to Forbes, research shows that people who write them down in favorable terms are 1.2 to 1.4 times more likely to achieve them.
  • Plan daily movement
  • Plan for mental breaks through your day
  • Find an accountability partner
  • Define specific ways to alleviate stressors in your life and be okay with them.

Clean Up Your Diet

  •  You really are what you eat. Your body feels like what we eat. Be intentional with your food choices. It’s also a great way to eliminate brain fog that we often are challenged with.
  • Read with Intention. Did you know that the most successful people in the world have one thing in common: THEY READ! Reading is one of the easiest ways to learn and keep strategies fresh, boost your creativity, and simply relax for some. Warren Buffett, who says he spends 80% of his time reading and writing, attributes a considerable amount of his success to these two things.
  • Be mindful of who you are surrounding yourself with. You need people from all walks of life on life’s journey. You need the Challengers, the Desirables, and the Rockets. The Challengers are the less desirables. Challengers start the rumor mills, are carriers of toxicity, know everything about everyone, yet never have an introspective view, hardly ever have a positive attitude about anything, glass half empty, and can tell you a million reasons your forward-thinking won’t work. The Desirables are those you enjoy being around, glass half full, encourage you as you share new plans and ideas, and have empty for those in your shared environment. The Rockets are those who have surpassed where you are, but remain humble and always willing to help others with their goals, have empathy for others, willing to be a mentor to others, glass half full. Successful people mostly ascertain the Rockets and Desirables!
  • Take an Inventory of Who you Follow on Social Media. Look at the characteristics of the Rockets and Desirables. Allow this measure to serve as one of the criteria you would like to follow on your Social Media sites.

Watch Your Words

  • Reframing your words reframes your mind- Yehuda Berg says, “Words are singularly the most powerful force available to humanity… Words have energy and power with the ability to help, to heal, to hurt, to harm, to humiliate, and to humble.” Our words can build others up or tear others down.  They also have the power to build ourselves or tear ourselves down. 
  • Your words have meaning-  The greatest mistake we can make is believing our words have no value in other people’s lives. Have you ever had a conversation with someone and, for whatever reason, can still remember it practically verbatim years down the road? Now consider a similar conversation in someone else’s life: your words could be the ones they have in their head.

    The words we choose mean something. Whether that meaning is positive or negative is up       to you. If you want to live altruistically and impact the world, try starting with the daily words       you choose. How do you talk to others, yourself, your superiors, and your inferiors? When         we recognize our words’ value, we take the first step in building our communities.

  • People Remember Words- Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt! LIES! While this was an all too well-known chant many were taught as children, we have found that this is clearly a myth. Words hurt! Many still suffer the hurt of unresolved emotional childhood trauma. Words are part of this trauma. 
  • Words Make Things Happen-  Simply put, Words Manifest Dreams. Speak it and Believe It, then Watch it Happen. 
  • Speak with Intention-  Rather than speaking out emotionally and uncontrollably on any issue, carefully consider and use well-thought-out words. Your words could impact others. This means recognizing poor language choices and readjusting to live a more intentional life.

We should live an altruistic life which includes speaking altruistically. The words you choose in your life have meaning; they are remembered; they make a difference. When we recognize the power our words have, we can gain power. We become a positive force in the community around us and in our world. 

Choose your words wisely.

Now you are READY to Write Your Professional Goals for the Year and Keep them in View

Setting a set of professional goals is vital at this time more than ever. Since the pandemic, many have decided they really enjoy their career path or otherwise. Some have realized the need to become more knowledgeable in other areas of their company or outside their organization. 

When making professional goals, you will need to determine short and long-term objectives. Think about whether these goals are something you want to accomplish in your day-to-day role or a significant change that occurs eventually. 

Make these goals specific, measurable, attainable and have a realistic timeline for reaching these goals.

Relate these goal possibilities to your current role:

  • Get an internship
  • Grow your professional network community
  • Move into a leadership position
  • Pursue an additional certification or degree
  • Become an expert at …….
  • Improve your time management skills
  • Improve your organizational skills so that you are better prepared to …………
  •  Utilize a new productivity strategy

Start the process by writing out what you would like your dream job to look like. Be sure to list every aspect of your dream job.

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Author, Blogger, Presenter, Educator, Trauma Resilience Instructor, SEL Thought Leader, Mother, Wife & Calligraphist